BEWARE OF BISON (girl gored in Yellowstone)

May 17, 2015

A gored girl learned the hard way never again to turn her backside on grazing bison. 

The Taiwanese tourist was posing for a quick photo at Yellowstone’s famous geyser, with a herd of the horned critters picturesquely standing in the background, when one of them suddenly charged her and poked her in the butt.

No charges, however, will be brought against the homicidally irate beast who, park officials explained, was basically just doing his job.

A spokeswoman for Yellowstone National Park said the 16-year-old was simply too close for comfort, and that the injury the gored victim was promptly treated for is not life-threatening.

She as well took the opportunity to remind all park visitors to stay on the trails and to keep a safe distance from any wildlife they come upon, especially bears, wolves, bighorns, moose, elk and bison.

"Bison can sprint three times faster than humans can run, and are unpredictable and dangerous," she warned.

@EponymousRox

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