Why You Should Decline Invites to the ZONE OF DEATH

Aug 6, 2015

Until further notice, decline all invites to the Zone of Death in Yellowstone National Park, unless of course you want to risk becoming a victim of the “perfect crime.” 

For years law experts have been warning congressional leaders that a 50-square-mile section of Yellowstone’s wilderness presents a logistical nightmare for both state and federal prosecutors if a capital offense is ever committed there.

Yet, so far, nobody has attempted to close a legal loophole that exists within the small parcel of parkland that, while encompassed by the federal district of Wyoming, like the rest of Yellowstone, is actually situated in Idaho.

As a result, the two merging jurisdictions pose a very real threat that one clever perpetrator -- with knowledge of the Zone of Death’s territorial configuration, and their right to a juried trial -- could literally get away with murder.

The prosecutorial pitfall is created by the U.S. Constitution itself, which ensures that any citizen charged with a criminal offense is entitled to be tried by a jury and that, moreover, those jurors must reside in both the federal district and state that the crime took place in.

Unfortunately though, no one lives in the Idaho portion of Yellowstone National Park…

Eponymous Rox

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