MAINE MANIAC CONFESSES TO MURDER

Aug 22, 2015

Police say the Maine maniac who stabbed a Shaws supermarket shopper to death for no reason this week has confessed, sparing authorities the unnecessary formality of launching a major investigation. 

The shaven-headed, wild-eyed, 30-something slasher -- apprehended in a bloody isle where people usually browse for ice cream -- told detectives she was basically having a bad hair day when she approached an older customer and slit the woman’s throat.

MAINE MANIAC CONFESSES TO MURDER

Connor MacCalister’s homicidal outburst left her 59-year-old “randomly” chosen victim dead and onlookers in shock, in an unprovoked attack motivated solely because she was “angry with life and wanted to get back at someone.”

Allegedly, the knife-wielding killer of Wendy Boudreau also admitted that she originally planned to chop up “several random people” on Wednesday, but was prevented from doing so when a number of those other potential casualties subdued her instead.

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